Profs, students say being single is okay on Valentine's Day
By Katrina Garcia
The Collegian
They come out marching in pairs once a year, proclaiming lust, love and the promise of forever.
They come bearing gifts of flowers, chocolate and a Hallmark card.
And they keep parties of one waiting for hours at restaurants everywhere.
While couples celebrate Valentine’s Day together, those without a significant other have the option of spending time with friends or family. But is it possible for Valentine’s Day to stir up negative— perhaps even depressing— emotions in single hearts?
Junior Andrew Martinez said being single on Valentine’s Day isn’t a big deal. He said the worst advice someone once gave him was to quickly find a date before the holiday.
“He said, ‘Quick, go get a girlfriend,’” Martinez said. “I don’t think it’s a necessity. It’s kind of silly.”
However, others do feel the stress of finding someone to share kisses and conversation hearts with, especially if they just lost a lover.
“I guess it’s a little bit depressing,” junior Julian Ramirez said. “It sucks because it’s like a race of the single people. You want to be with someone, but all the good ones are taken. Newly single people get left in the dust.”
Karl Oswald, a Fresno State cognitive psychology professor, is more than just a non-supporter of Valentine’s Day— he has a “Valentine’s Day Rant” he delivers to his classes every year.
“I think Valentine’s Day can have beneficial, positive effects, but I think overall it negatively affects everyone at large,” Oswald said.
Oswald said while he has no scientific data to back up his claims, he has a strong personal opinion about it.
“It perpetuates the ridiculous notion that one needs to be in a relationship to be validated,” Oswald said. “It highlights being single as a negative aspect of one’s life and it’s certainly not.”
Oswald believes the holiday sends the message to single people that they are outcasts.
Oswald said people in relationships still have the potential to feel hurt on Valentine’s Day.
“It’s the one day out of the year when you can get a card and still feel hurt because it’s not enough,” Oswald said. “If you got a card any other day, you’d feel special.”
Oswald proposes not only that people choose random days to celebrate their relationships, but a new holiday be taken into effect: an Anti-Valentine’s Day.
Called “Singles Day,” it would be celebrated exactly six months after Valentine’s Day, and all singles would be able to go out and relish in their single status.
Some students and professors agree Valentine’s Day affects everyone differently, but if people are affected by the holiday negatively, then they should reevaluate where they place the greatest emphasis in life.
Christine Edmondson, a Fresno State clinical psychologist, said Valentine’s Day doesn’t affect people unless they are vulnerable when it comes to thinking they need to be in a relationship and it reinforces sad thoughts and feelings.
“Well-being is based on various areas of life, not just having a boyfriend or girlfriend,” Edmondson said.
Comment on this story in the Features forum >>
|
