I changed my mind about growing up

From the moment you are held up by your ankles and slapped on the butt you wish you were older. At least that’s what I think.

When you’re little you see big kids riding big bikes without training wheels. You see big kids taking bites out of big candy bars. You see big kids getting bigger allowances.

When you’re younger everything seems bigger and better and you can’t help but want to be older.

The urge to grow older starts during kindergarten. You want a whole graham cracker and carton of milk in class because you want everyone to know you’re a big kid now. You want to play house so you can pretend you’re like your parents. You just want to be older.

In elementary school you want to be older so you can checkout basketballs and footballs and throw them around the playground. Puberty hits and you start having butterflies in your stomach and heart every time you see someone pretty or handsome. Those are grown folks’ feelings. You want to be older.

Then you look forward to turning 16. You’ll be able to drive a car and take your friends as far as a jobless-living-off-your-parents teenager can go with a $5 weekly allowance. You still want to be older.

Then the elusive 18 arrives like a gentle breeze on a hot day and you know you can buy cigarettes (to smoke (to shorten your life expectancy)), get into a dance club (to get groped by old men), buy a lottery ticket (to start realizing you’re not that lucky) or buy adult films (to, uh, entertain yourself). You still think you should be older.

This tease of freedom only lasts about 30 days. You’ll start thinking about how lame it is not be able to buy alcohol — and you wait for that day to come. You believe you have every reason to celebrate because when you hit 21 you become a bona fide adult. Right? Right.

Then you turn 21 and you slowly start to feel as if you’re getting older. But you have one more age to look forward to, 25. Reaching this age brings the promise of cheaper car insurance. Since when have you ever cared about saving money? You’re getting older.

Once you pass the halfway mark in your 20s you start feeling as if you have nothing to look forward to. Instead of growing older, you’re just growing old.

It hits you hard, I’m sure, knowing that life is taking its sweet time to get good. At least that’s how I feel.
It’s actually a bummer how I look at my life this way. I shouldn’t look at life like I’m driving on the freeway looking for the next best place to exit.

Sometimes my older friends think I’m silly for my way of thinking. But I’m trying to change.

I know I shouldn’t worry about where my life is heading. I should just enjoy the ride. Now that’s real grown folks’ attitude.

Comment on this story in the Opinion forum >>