DHMO: an unspoken, deadly threat

YOUR LIVES ARE in danger and you don’t even know it.

In fact, the lives of your family, future children and the possibility of another remake of the Love Boat series are all at the whim of this deceptively innocuous chemical.

It contributes to global warning. Erosion results from acid rain and can easily kill the hardiest man or beast on this planet.

Trouble is, there has never been any effort to contain this insidious chemical or remove its pervasive influence from our land and lives forever.

Why hasn’t it been banned? Why do you think?

Lobbyists in Washington have persuaded the feeble-minded Republican majority and the pro-business Democrats to retain this chemical -— if only because it does such a good job as a minimum-grade cleaning solution.

At least that’s what they tell us.

Dihydrogen Monoxide — more often than not abbreviated to DHMO — is a constant source of worry for those of us in the know. You are now in the know.

I bring it upon myself to enlighten you of its dangers.

It is odorless, tasteless and dissolves instantly in water. These are not the only similarities to the fictional and infamously deadly iocane powder. The only way DHMO is different is in that it’s real.

Fear it.

The tsunami that struck the Southeast with deadly force last year, the tornados that ravage the Midwest and — get ready for a shocker — Hurricane Katrina all had at least sufficient amounts of DHMO that I strongly suspect played some significant part in the natural disasters.

In fact, every significant climatic disaster of the past 50 years has had DHMO play a part. Natural disaster, so-called? Hardly.

How can this careless corruption in the highest levels of government go unpunished? Why haven’t the American people been notified?

I blame President Bush and his anti-civil-rights, anti-free-speech, right-wing, kleptocrat, plutocrat GOP legislature that this is still an issue.

Gore and Nader — may their candidacies rest in peace — would have immediately banned DHMO.

Kucinich would have been much better than Bush, though. He would have let your children choose for themselves whether they wanted to live or not.

The government tries and ultimately fails to cover up the existence of DHMO.

I wouldn’t have even heard about it until I read upon the teachings of Dr. Tom Way at his Web site he tirelessly updates with new information.

I found on his site that some athletes try to boost their performance by using a dosage of DHMO that sounds almost lethal, and this same chemical is found in almost every lake, stream and well in the Northeastern United States.

If this weren’t both true and menacing, why did the EPA ask Dr. Way to take this site down a few years ago? Outrageous.

Two Kansas City radio personalities, thinking this issue was some sort of morbid joke, were arrested for revealing the chemical and symptoms that include “increased urination, profuse sweating and wrinkling of hands and feet.”

They reported, and not erroneously, that “boiling the water long enough would get rid of the substance, however.”

I plan to write a paper about the effects of DHMO for my life science class, citing this very credible Web site as my primary source.

I trust what I read online. Why would someone say something like this that wasn’t true?

Write your congressmen and women on every level of government about DHMO. Hopefully, while they’re contemplating a tax hike to fund education.

I’m sure any argument in favor of a DHMO ban will help them make their decision on that tax hike.

Where’s Michael Moore? I want him to make a documentary.

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