UHS students clutter campus environment

By Thomas Gaffery

Think back in history, to a time when there were rotary telephones, everyone knew how to drive a stick shift and William Shatner was cool. Long before those awful Priceline.com commercials and his heinous singing career, he used to be popular, have natural hair and some women misconstrued him as sexy. During this era, “Star Trek” was popular on television. In one particular episode, the crew of the starship Enterprise encountered Tribbles. Tribbles are these small furry creatures that resembled large dust bunnies. The episode was called “The Trouble with Tribbles” because tribbles multiplied like rabbits or—well—dust bunnies.

University High School students are like tribbles. They seem to be constantly multiplying, and I hope it is in a completely non-procreative manner. When I arrived at Fresno State in fall 2000, the first onslaught of University High School students arrived from their respective juvenile education centers.

I was often shocked and dismayed by their presence and frightened by their sheer numbers. I could never imagine what was to come. I remember reading The Collegian and discussing with my friends the onslaught of these pre-adults. They all look so young. I often wonder when their nannies come in to change their diapers.

The presence of these kids has gotten worse over time. They have multiplied exponentially. I assume there is almost four years worth of them now. As I was walking through the Student Union, I was accosted by a horde of these pre-adults. At noon, they clutter the food lines, monopolize the recreation center and commandeer seating in a Napoleonic manner. They clog campus walkways and their portable buildings are an architectural eyesore.

A college campus and a high school campus are two vastly different locales. Even if the UHS children are smarter and better mannered than other high school children, they are still in an inappropriate setting. It is an embarrassment when I am walking across campus with faculty and our conversation is drowned out by the giggling of children.

There is an attitude and level of sophistication that seems to evolve when someone becomes a full-time college student. It is this presence of being that makes it so easy to distinguish between UHS students and Fresno State students.

I wonder what people think who visit our campus and may be unaware of UHS. Donors, alumni and prospective student may misconstrue UHS students as Fresno State students. This mistake reflects poorly on the University and could have many disastrous negative impacts.

When University High School students use the Student Union or read The Collegian, they are benefiting from services that we as Fresno State students support with our fees. On the other hand, they are a great source of revenue when it comes to the recreation center and food service. I guess if we can take their money, maybe it can make us feel a bit better about the inconvenience of their presence.

Don’t misunderstand me—I do not dislike the students of University High School. UHS is a charter school and filled with exceptionally bright students. However, intelligence aside, there is a lot to be said for the socialization that occurs with age. To be fair, there are many older people who are socially uncouth and stupid—so I will give these kids the benefit of the doubt. I am sure they are wonderful people who are jovial and full of life. However, they sometimes clog our campus like leaves in a storm drain.

Like leaves in a drain, tribbles began to take over the starship Enterprise and made the ship near uninhabitable and non-operational. In the episode of “Star Trek”, the crew of the Enterprise was able to finally defeat the Tribbles by beaming them aboard a Klingon ship.

This is obviously not a possibility—but I suggest we buy them all one-way bus tickets to Cal State Dominguez Hills.

— This columnist can be reached at collegian@csufresno.edu