Mac Miller’s lost album “Balloonerism” captures a transcendent journey through the complex ideas of self-reflection and emotional growth, as he navigates his inner world with vulnerability. The album’s explorative nature blends genres and sounds, offering a unique combination of introspection and groove that defies boundaries.
“Balloonerism” is Miller’s second posthumous album release and explores themes of death, suicide and drugs. These recurring themes throughout the album make it a very poignant listen, especially after his accidental overdose in 2018.
The album was soft-launched at the Camp Flog Gnaw Carnival this past November, previewed in between Sampha and The Alchemist’s set, with the cover art and a brief audio snippet of 5 Dollar Pony Rides playing in the background.
“Balloonerism” is a mixtape that dates all the way back to 2013, in the peak of Miller’s exploration with creativity and new sounds. This album was recorded in between his previous sophomore albums “Watching TV With The Sound Off” and “Faces,” but was ultimately shelved in favor of other projects he was working on. Fans began piecing together snippets of the album from leaked songs that were circulating online.
Features
The album has one official feature and two unacclaimed features. SZA is the most notable feature on “DJ’s Chord Organ (feat. SZA).” “Balloonerism” was recorded around the time that her album “Z” was released. Bringing vocals from “Z” to the forefront, this song really showcased her deeper, raspy voice mixed with the delicate guitar and synth sounds in the background, which were her staples at the beginning of her career.
Thundercat was also a feature on “DJ’s Chord Organ (feat. SZA),” and a producer on multiple tracks including: “5 Dollar Pony Rides,” “Friendly Hallucinations,” “Mrs. Deborah Downer,” “Funny Papers,” “Transformations (feat. Delusional Thomas)” and “Rick’s Piano.”
Delusional Thomas
In 2013, after his album “Watching TV With The Sound Off,” Miller began recording music under another persona that he created named Delusional Thomas.
Delusional Thomas is a persona Miller created for himself as a representation of who he is when he is on drugs, expressed through lyrics and music.
Thomas has a higher pitched voice during songs. He is essentially a different character, one that Miller can explore with and one that is completely different than Miller himself. Thomas has a more delirious flow and when he is featured in songs, the theme he touches on the most is sexual violence.
Thomas released a self-titled mixtape with ten tracks on it, also around the time he started recording “Balloonerism.” He is featured on four tracks in the album, “Do You Have A Destination,” “Rick’s Piano,” “Excelsior” and “Transformations.”
My picks
“Stoned”
This is one of the songs on the album that has no features and was produced solely by Miller. After a few listens, the song feels like a fusion of the soulful lyrics of “Swimming” and the ethereal, reflective soundscapes of “Circles,” blending warmth and melancholy cohesively. The bluesy guitar in the beginning immediately caught my attention, as it sets the tone for the rest of the song and perfectly transitions into Miller’s voice with a slow drum beat behind it that is exactly what the song was needing. This song feels reflective and melancholic. It reflects Miller’s difficulty differentiating the relationship he has with himself and his partner. His tender lyrics and emotive voice mix seamlessly with the slow pulse of the drums, synth layers and delicate adlibs, creating a sound that feels both intimate and transcendent.
“Friendly Hallucinations”
Before going into a deep dive about this song, I knew that Thundercat had to be a part of the production. The song mixes jazz, soul, funk and hip-hop so seamlessly that it’s genre-blurring. It shows Miller’s song writing maturity, and his ability to explore different sounds while still making it his own. “Friendly Hallucinations” asks deep, introspective questions about love, reality and exploration of the mind. Its tranquil tone and captivating sound mixed with the small bits and pieces of high synths make it not only catchy, but reflective.
“Tomorrow Will Never Know”
As the track goes on it adds more layers to digest, creating a more psychedelic sound as the 11 minute song progresses. It blends abstract and ambient sounds, and explores the intricacies of the blurred lines between life and death. The song’s instrumental outro, with its dreamy synths and the distant sound of children laughing, brings a feeling of nostalgia for a simpler time in Miller’s life before fame and addiction. The sound of a ringing phone fades in, acting as a haunting reminder of the moments leading up to his overdose. The repeated, unanswered voicemails are a heartbreaking symbol of his passing and the finality of it all.
Honorable Mentions
“Do You Have A Destination” deserves a special mention. The jazz-style instrumentals mixed with the mellow, but hard-hitting drums feels like a conversation, bouncing back and forth but remaining constant in flow. His lyrics are confident, yet he remains humble at the same time, contemplating morality and character as he battles with his own thoughts.
“DJ’s Chord Organ (feat. SZA)” has also been on repeat. This song captures Miller’s vulnerability, and his sort of imposter syndrome he feels with being an artist. The continued organ sound gives something for your ears to latch onto, remaining constant with a thick beat slowly creeping in, and Miller’s vocals creating unease. The song drops perfectly into SZA’s raspy flow and plays with different sounds and layers as the track goes on.
“Balloonerism” brings emotional weight and artistic depth, feeling like a bridge between Mac Miller’s past and his legacy. This project seamlessly blends genres and introspective themes while showcasing Miller’s unmatched ability to create music that resonates deeply with listeners. “Balloonerism” is not just an album; it’s an experience, and a reminder of an artist who continues to leave an indelible mark on the world of music, even after his passing.