Some people love shoes. For others, it’s handbags, sweaters, skinny jeans, crop tops, whatever.
While I have fallen victim to all of these shopping addictions at one point or another, there is one crime of the heart I am always guilty of committing.
I love underwear shopping. It’s something I can never get enough of.
Now, I don’t really go shopping all that often, but if there’s one thing I splurge on, it’s underwear.
If you’ve seen the Victoria’s Secret or Pink commercials, then you’ve seen all the models in a variety of underwear styles. Bikini, thong, hipster, all-over lace, cotton, you name it. And if you’ve been to the store, you’ve seen how expensive they are. Even the special sales are hardly a deal.
For years, I shopped for underwear strictly at Pink, but now, I’m obsessed with American Eagle. They have better marketing with their Aerie Real campaign and unretouched photos, and I feel better giving them my money than Victoria’s Secret (though I’m still guilty of shopping there, too).
For me, few things are more satisfying than folding all of my undies into perfect little stacks according to style and material. After laundry day, it feels like Christmas knowing that I have so many options to choose from.
In all honesty, I don’t think I have that much underwear. But my mom and my friend and my boyfriend all beg to differ.
But let’s be realistic — you’re never going to say, “Oh no, I have *too much* underwear.”
That’s just not a thing. You can never have too much underwear, because it’s something most people wear every day, and the kind you wear might change depending on your mood or outfit.
I don’t know who made the brilliant decision that half of women’s clothes should be see-through, but it really makes shopping for underwear into a strategy game. I have to make sure I get the right color and the right material to make sure it can’t be seen.
And don’t even get me started on panty lines. Whoever decided women should care about them was just looking for another useless, sexist expectation for us to all feel the pressure to adhere to. And I do pay attention to panty lines and avoid them at all reasonable costs.
I think it’s important to have lots of pairs of underwear. Especially as a woman, if I didn’t have an excessive amount of underwear, I’d probably cry. And then go shopping for more, if I’m financially stable.
Because as a woman, there is a whole lot that can go on downstairs, OK? So it’s important to wear clean panties and change them every day.
Or several times a day. Do as you please.
Plus, they rip or get worn out over time, so you have to get new panties as you get rid of the old ones.
So yeah, if you’re ever around when I’m folding laundry, don’t shame me for the amount of underwear I have. And don’t bring up the amount of bralettes either.