It’s time, friends ”” my long-awaited farewell column has finally arrived.
I’ve been thinking for a long time about how I should write this piece. My first drafts date from April 2009, when I was editing the news section of The Collegian. I had taken over this section unexpectedly when another editor, who had agreed to the position, changed his mind before the spring 2009 semester. For two years prior to that, I had edited the opinion section.
And if you were reading the opinion section in those days (I like to call them the “glory days” ”” sorry Tony), then I bet you remember my face. Because it was plastered all over this section. When I ran this page, I was the star of my own show.
In those days, I remember students whispering up and down the McKee Fisk hallways, “Are you ready for another season of Matt Gomes?”
And no, actually, they weren’t ready. They never were.
In any case, in spring 2009, that all came to an end, and I had to start assigning “stories,” and checking “sources.” It was all so overwhelming.
Around midterm, panic started to set in. My loyal readership was wondering where I went. I heard the whispers again, rumors creeping down the hallways of the Speech Arts building, like that scene in The Shining when the blood rushes out of the elevator in slow motion, all the way back to my desk.
“I heard it’s writer’s block!”
“I heard he got fired!”
“I heard he killed a guy!”
“I heard it was three!”
Readers, it was zero guys. I was actually posted up at a desk located just feet away from my old desk, trying desperately to find an “angle” that would make the next Academic Senate meeting seem appealing.
Now, I realize that such rumors could only come from fair-weather These were the readers who might dip in from time to time to see what I had to say about hot topics: Fresno State’s showing at UCLA; the last presidential elections; the great non-binding IRA fee referendum of 2008.
But, for those loyal readers, the ones of you who would comment week after week on my columns, I knew I needed an answer. I needed to set the record straight.
And so, in April 2009, I began drafting. One night, I wrote 10 drafts. I wrote them with passion. Furiously. Religiously. And when I was done, I was still not satisfied.
My yearning to tell you all precisely how I felt about you was always greater than my capacity to satisfy that yearning in language. For example, just reread that last sentence.
Suffice it to say, I never quite figured out the right words that semester. I wrote drafts, I threw them away. I wrote new drafts, and then I threw those away. Draft after draft after draft.
Did you know that there’s a point when your computer’s Recycle Bin will stop letting you throw things away?
Readers, I’ve seen that threshold, and I’ve crossed it. Sometimes, I threw drafts away before I even started writing them.
But, then one night, a revelation. If I knew any audience, I knew my readers, readers! And I knew then how patient, and faithful you all would be while I crafted my goodbye.
Dedicated reader, I want to thank you for your love and support. Yes, I received and read all of your e-mails, which have flooded my inbox since February 2009. Each one fills me with such joy.
Even if I don’t have time to respond to them all, I appreciate deeply your care, concern and loyalty.
I also want to respond to more of the rumors I’ve heard whispered through the proverbial “grapevine,” as well echoing in the stone hallways of the Industrial Technology building.
I don’t mean to break too many hearts when I say this, but unfortunately, my days at The Collegian are numbered.
And today, those numbers reach an end, as all numbers must.
That is to say, this will likely be, for many of you, the last you hear from me in the pages of The Collegian.
As I learned from a deeply affecting moment at last May’s Prince concert, one can only perform so many encores.
The fans will beg you and beg you for more. You’ll give it your all, play one more hit, maybe “Controversy,” and then descend offstage in a fog of smoke. But the chanting will fire you up again. And you’ll play one more, “When Doves Cry,” and then you’ll be done.
And then “Pink Cashmere.”
And then “Raspberry Beret.”
And then “Adore.”
But you know ”” and you know that everybody knows ”” eventually, you’ll all have to go home.
That said, Prince continues to be pretty prolific.
Matt Gomes was a fixture at The Collegian, serving as a former columnist, opinion editor and news editor for The Collegian from 2006-2009. He recently received his Master’s in English Composition Theory.
MALCOLMCLYDES • Sep 19, 2011 at 10:37 pm
WE ALL GONNA MISS YA SON !!!
Philosotroll • Sep 19, 2011 at 4:13 pm
It’s too bad to see Gomes go. We will miss you. May you venture on to bigger and better things.
Cody@Columbia • Sep 19, 2011 at 2:06 pm
The Collegian really lost a gem…then.
I really grew to understand your positions at the end of my tenure at Fresno State. When I first started talking to you about campus politics, I had just started running for Senate. And I’ll be honest, I was sure you were wrong.
Now that I live 3,000 miles away, I can safely say that you were not wrong. Maybe not completely right, but definitely not wrong. I think that all of those institutions at Fresno State that receive student money should have some student control revoked.
I can only hope that institutions, like ASI and the Collegian, remember that whatever they do, or decide to represent, they do it with genuine purpose to improve the community of Fresno State. And not divide it.
Respectfully Submitted,
Cody Madsen
JuanLG • Sep 19, 2011 at 12:05 pm
The Dude abides (and is prolific).
colinmcfresno • Sep 19, 2011 at 11:07 am
We’ll miss you, Matt! You will always be my favorite editor – none shall stand up to you.