You are kind of asking for it when you get a job in retail. The customer service aspect of it will open your eyes to just how strange people can be. I̢۪ve worked at Blockbuster for three years now: two here and one in my hometown of Atwater. I thought maybe it was the small town that made the customers so weird, but clearly it is just a video renting thing.

Never mind the fact that our “restocking feeâ€Â policy is confusing or that we change our promotions weekly; disgruntled customers, I’m right there with you. I’m talking about things that are in your control.

At the store I work at we have three doors: one entrance, one exit and one emergency exit. Very often people try the exit door, get confused that it won̢۪t open, then go around the side of the store to the emergency exit, then find their way to the entrance. Our doors aren̢۪t two ways, so we have to wipe them down often because people run into them trying to go the wrong way. One time an older customer complained that it was a fire hazard and that she was going to call the cops on us.

We should also start setting up a daycare center. I had a lady carrying what looked like her sleeping grandchild who asked me if she could leave her in the corner so she could do shopping at other stores. Children get left behind by their families too. There was this little girl, Hannah, who was stuck at the store for hours as employees tried to get a hold of the family. I think the police finally got her home. Either that, or I̢۪m mixing up my stories because another little girl was left in the same month. Also, watch your children when they are playing with candy fans. We̢۪ve thrown out quite a number because kids got wads of hair stuck in the fans.

I̢۪ve lost count of how many people ask if we carry adult movies. Most are over the phone, but occasionally they come inside the store. It̢۪s even better when, after you tell them we don̢۪t, they quickly tell you it̢۪s for their friend.

When asked what product we should start selling, an overwhelming amount of people put “watermelonâ€Â in a recent survey. There is a Save Mart right next door. We also get a fair amount of drunkards and potheads after about 9, when we close at midnight. Once there was a sobriety checkpoint set up near our store and our crowd was significantly decreased. We lost a lot of money that night. You guys buy all kinds of food from us and get weaseled easily into promotions, so I’m welcome to having you.

I think the best customers are our regulars though. Everyday, Navarro drops off his movies wrapped in rubber bands that are tied in a bag, plays at Chukchansi, grabs lunch at Taco Bell, picks up new movies, and then takes the bus. It̢۪s an exact procedure. Drew only comes in on Tuesdays when I am working, and thanks to the upcoming election, lectures me for up to a half hour when a line is building about how much she hates Obama. Thank goodness for this change because she was going into detail about all her illnesses. Kirk always asks about the latest violent movies. Emery repeats his name up to five times in a single visit and has phone conversations in our doorways.

So next time you are in a Blockbuster (or Hollywood Video, I don̢۪t care), be on the lookout for the people among you. If you stay long enough, I̢۪m sure you̢۪ll be in for a show.