FOR THE LAST few weeks I have been utterly, over-the-top scared out of my mind.

And no, it’s not been in anticipation about the latest nail-biting thriller — “Vacancy.�

And no, it’s not about “Disturbia,�either. (Man, what’s with all these scary movies? There’s nothing like April flowers and showers to get one all spooky and goose bumped. Anyway, that’s a completely different issue, but trust me — the topic I’m going to delve into is far more terrifying than your basic Hollywood killer.)

This giant thing staring at me in the ultimate staring contest, just looming over my head, taunting me and taking up residence semi-permanently at the back of my brain is the dreaded I’m-about-to-graduate-college-and-the crap-is-now-scared-out-of-me résumé.

For some reason it has been physically impossible for me to put my fingers to the keyboard and write this monstrosity.

And not having the ability to type is pretty bad news for a fledgling journalist.

I mean, this is no regular résumé that you pass out to every other bored employee at the mall.

Oh no.

Even though the only thing different between that resume and this résumé is the addition of the words “bachelor’s degree� to the education section, this resume is worlds different than that little-kid-training-wheels résumé.

Because by writing the résumé, it means this is it. It’s time for the real world — whatever that is.

I’m not so sure I want into this real world. Especially after I had a realization last week that I’m just like any pre-graduate senior — my mind is filled with delusions about my fantasy world after college.

Instead of ice cream rivers and cupcake clouds, this fairy tale land is filled instead with an incredibly high paying job right out of college, a job with tons of perks, perfect hours and a great dental plan.

This job practically fell into one̢۪s lap the second you registered for graduation and although you were totally underqualified for the job, your new boss decided you were just right for your dream job and hired you on the spot.

I hate to admit it but I’ve turned into Heidi from the MTV reality show “The Hills.� (Maybe you say my delusions have something to do with watching “The Hills.� But I never wanted to watch “The Hills.� Or “Laguna Beach.� Or even “The O.C.,� for that matter. It’s simply beyond my control. See, this résumé business has got me all mixed up.)

Just in case any of you are not a part of the pop culture phenomenon of the awesome ladies of the Beverly Hills̢۪ reality show, Heidi was a character who dropped out of fashion school in Los Angeles to take on her dream career at an event planning agency.

She thought she would be at the door of all of Hollywood̢۪s exclusive hot spots but instead found herself stuffing envelopes.
Wake me up from that dream!

But there was hope for Heidi and I̢۪m sure there̢۪s hope for me.

Although Heidi was ready to quit her real world nine-to-five job after the first day, she stuck with it and eventually made it to working at the clubs.

Looks like after some hard work and perseverance, one̢۪s first real life job can turn into one̢۪s pretty dreamy job.

If Heidi can do it, so can I.

At first I had considered graduate school after college, mostly to put off the real world just a little bit longer.

But now as the final weeks of school and class sessions drag on by, I think I̢۪m ready to give this school thing a break and try out that real world.

Somebody’s gotta get out there and conquer the world and it might as well be me. I guess the first step is finishing that résumé.
Real world, here I come.